Growing Up

I think I just have to get used to this time of year being my big reminder that growing up isn't all Barbie and the Dream House or Knots Landing ... ok, maybe occasionally a little Knot's Landing.... The last few weeks have been big reminders that life changes on a dime and not always for the better, and sometimes it all just takes some getting used to.

As we approched Thanksgiving, we were saddened to lose a close family friend. Someone that, in my whole life I remember as a big smile and always good for a laugh and a hug. He was a good friend to my dad and probably the only one of few he had left. Harder than the news that he was gone was the sad message from my dad that Saturday morning. My heart just broke when I heard the tears through the phone. But what was better was the support that my mom showed - of course not directly to my dad - but through me for him and on his behalf at this sad time. It is sad to see him go but anyone who knew him - knows that he is with us all. I tell you what gets me everytime this happens, are the kids that are my age and younger that are now without a parent for the rest of their life. When this happens, I want to put my parents in a time capsule so they will never leave me. I think of the extreme pain they must be in and how unfair it is to lose someone that important so soon.

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And than a week later I get the news that my other friend has lost her father to a terrible brain disease. This is something more expected but yet brings a 29 year old to the point of being the adult burying her parent. She had watched him fade away so gradually for the last 4 years to this day she had both dreaded and awaited. I stopped by the wake on Friday night - I should have stayed but I really just couldn't. I hadn't been to Kevin's funeral - I had only mourned on my own and now I was at Rebecca's dad's funeral wake and I was just a ball of mush - I wanted to sit down and cry but I had to be strong because she was obviously trying to do that for her mom and I would have just ruined it all. So I kept my cool and got on my way.

Next was the cookie bake weekend - quality time with the family. But since we are talking sucky growing up moments - I will note that my mom and her boyfriend's baby talk is so flippin annoying!! This is the moment you wonder where you went wrong... hehe. I know that this is a regression caused by the fact that she was never this happy with my dad or was never treated this good with my dad but really, is the baby talk necessary - or the baby talk on the phone ONLY when you are locked in the car with her going 65 mph and no way out!! I had a long "therapy" session with a coworker last night about this. She is divorced and usually very good about coming to mom's defense when I get upset but she seemed to hear me out last night. Either way - I know that sometimes I feel like I could be speaking harshly because I am alone and she is not but I really don't think that is the case. I haven't heard baby talk with a couple (any couple) since HS - or maybe current friends that are early college but still - when you are 54 and 50 - don't you think you have been around enough to know that crap is annoying to the innocent bystanders??

Then there is the newest reminder - my 10 year reunion is coming up next summer! OH MY GOD! Where has the time gone and CRAP! I am in a pinch for time. I have a reunion, a cruise, and 3 weddings next year!

Gotta go to the gym and therapy now....

Loves and kisses to all!